Lisa, vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos.

I’ve had it with this school, Skinner. Low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children…

Old people don’t need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use. Hi. I’m Troy McClure. You may remember me from such self-help tapes as “Smoke Yourself Thin” and “Get Some Confidence, Stupid!”

Look out, Itchy! He’s Irish! Slow down, Bart! My legs don’t know how to be as long as yours. Lisa, vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos. I don’t like being outdoors, Smithers. For one thing, there’s too many fat children.

I’m allergic to bee stings. They cause me to, uh, die. Don’t kid yourself, Jimmy. If a cow ever got the chance, he’d eat you and everyone you care about! Marge, just about everything’s a sin. Y’ever sat down and read this thing? Technically we’re not supposed to go to the bathroom.

  1. Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?
  2. I’m a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world.
  3. I’ve had it with this school, Skinner. Low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children…